How lucky, how cruel
To know truly I had this time with you
The flowers bloomed
And the sun rose high, and I remember you
That all I ever had to do, was smile and say I love you
Days pass on and I, go on without you
The deepness that we knew, the treasures, the moments
Of the everyday, here and there
Our memories shared, the laughter that lives forever
How bitter, how sweet
To know I must carry this on, for you
To dream again and again, that you never left
That all was never put to rest
“I am fine, I am here.” A wish that it was all misconstrued
To feel you once again, and wake up to know it’s all gone
How lucky, how cruel
For everyone that misses you, every story shared
Every precious item in my hand, I feel you, I cry for you
All the words and beauty you shared with me
Every true smile you gave to me, the years I kept you
How gracious, how adrift
For all the years I’ll never know, all those plans lost and we can’t go
To watch others achieve all the landmarks and congratulations
Ones you deserved and wished for
For all my baby’s smiles and touches I can’t share with you
All those questions and conversations we can’t have
Those moments I still need you
How lucky, how cruel
That you were bowed, but never broken, the strength that kept me through
We stood against the world, just us two
Fighting for each other, living for each other
We had just gained so much, lost so much together
We were about to have it all, new adventures, freedom, time, means
All wiped away by loss and disease
How wondrous, how terrible
To live and remember without you
But there is life within everything, it’s all confetti she said
You’ll dance around me, shining in all we do
Telling me not to linger here, for life is out there
A Mindful Repose 